The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
Recently, my best friend asked me to be her maid of honor (shoutout to you Mary) and as much as I was so excited and honored to have been asked, I was also overwhelmed. I had no idea what all I was now responsible for in the lead-up to the wedding. So, here I am, in an attempt to save all new and future maids of honor from the stress of not knowing what to do or how to start.
First and foremost: you are there for the bride entirely
You are her confidant, best friend and even the getaway driver if need be. Talk things through with the bride, know what style she wants and ideas she has for the celebrations that we will get to in a moment. Also, make sure you are having fun doing it. It should feel like an honor to be chosen and trusted with this responsibility, so put your heart into it.
Go wedding dress shopping with her
This was one of my favorite moments with the bride. Seeing how beautiful she was in the dresses and the look on her face when she found the perfect one was such a genuinely heartfelt moment that no one should miss. Being there with the bride to give your kind but honest feedback is very important, especially since she is probably going to feel overwhelmed and indecisive… at least, that was my best friend’s experience.
You are now the point of contact
From here on out, you serve as the contact for all things bridesmaids and wedding guest questions. Learn as much as you can about wedding details, present ideas, dates, etc. Having multiple people start asking the bride random questions will only make her more stressed out, so be that person to respond.
Also, being the maid of honor means that you are the main leader for all things bridesmaids, so introduce everyone ASAP. You will be spending a lot of time in person and in communication with them, so make sure to break the ice. Personally, I immediately made a group chat with everyone so that we could meet and plan for the celebrations, which leads me to my next point.
Plan the Bachelorette Party
Planning and executing the bachelorette party was such a fun part of the wedding process, so make sure it’s a good one. In planning the party, make sure you understand the bridesmaid’s schedules and budgets, as well as the bride’s wishes. Everyone will look to you for a plan, so be prepared with ideas.
I made a checklist for what to bring for the bridesmaids and the bride, along with an itinerary I sent out so everyone was on the same page. Also, make sure everyone is of the same understanding on paying. We made sure the bride did not pay a dime for her celebration, so make sure everyone has agreed to whatever you think is best.
Lastly on this note, let the bridesmaids help you with this part. They love her and want to celebrate just as much as you do, so let them be involved. For us, we all pitched in for decorations, food and drinks. One bridesmaid took charge of being the bartender to make the bride’s favorite drinks, while another bought dirty decorations and I made homemade games. Make this fun and collaborative to foster a positive bonding experience for everyone.
Plan the Bridal Shower
Two major things are needed from the bride first: the date to have the party and an invite list. Once you have those, you are good to go. This helps you to figure out where to hold the party and how big it needs to be. Personally, we held it at my family’s house since it wasn’t very many people, but that may or may not be possible for you.
Once you get a number and a date, it’s time to send out invitations. Make sure that the invitations to the actual wedding go out first or that would just be awkward. I used Canva to make the invitations and sent them out via email and text to the invitees. In planning the bridal shower, decorate how the bride would want it, with her favorite snacks and drinks. Also, make some games to play (I made a Kahoot) or print out some “About the Bride” games from Pinterest to have some activities to do.
Write a Speech for the wedding
I will be honest, my best friend’s wedding is in three weeks as I write this and the speech is stressing me out so much. I want it to be perfect and I am sure you feel the same. Pinterest is our friend here because there are so many good templates on what to add, so utilize them. Just show the bride you care, love and support her and it will go great… at least, that’s what I’m telling myself.
At the wedding, Make sure the bride eats and drinks
No, seriously, many brides admit that they never got a chance to eat at their own wedding, so make sure your bestie isn’t one of them. Weddings are fun, but they’re also very stressful, so don’t let her forget. This is especially if there will be alcohol at the wedding because you want her to actually be there for her big day—if you know what I mean. In addition, hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. The last thing we want is for the bride to get sick from not eating or drinking, so watch out for her.